Old 23rd September 2002, 19:54   #1
jon_joy_1999
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My damn cat

I just had my cat neutered. You know, I found something out.
You neuter a dog, they knida understand. Dogs are more like, "All right, All right, All Right. Dangit, I knew this was gonna happen."
You neuter a cat you better get ready for the guilt trip of yer life. We brought that cat home from the vet, he's draggin' his butt on the carpet. It's like "Look at mee, What's Missing From This Picture!?, What am I gonna Tell my friends?

I know if you got a cat you've made this mistake, you think your cat's asleep on the bed, and you move your foot under the covers and they're like "MOUSE! REEAR" and I don't care how hard you sling that cat against that wall, it never stuns 'em, does it. they just bounce off with that attitude, "Oh is that the way we're gonna play, all right. Check your boots buddy-boy".

My wife went berzerk with this cat. She taught this cat how to use the toilet and he does it! Do you know how bizare that is, wake up at 3 in the morning, stagger in the bathroom, like "OH HO HO, hey kitty!". He's sitting there with the paper "Hey Jon what's happenin'. Boy that garfield's a hoot isn't he.

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Old 23rd September 2002, 20:00   #2
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At least it hasn't been trained to flush the toilet. No opposable thumbs.
Watch Meet The Parents..funny comedy. There is a cat that has been trained to use the toilet.

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Old 23rd September 2002, 20:01   #3
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lol jon_joy! heh, you made me laugh now... Thanks.
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Old 23rd September 2002, 20:57   #4
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My cat is 21 years old and shits behind the computer.

There's no need to tell me when I'm right;
I operate on that principle exclusively and with absolute certainty
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Old 23rd September 2002, 21:04   #5
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Ah, 21 years old... My cat is 13 now, was afraid his time might come soon... But good to hear that they live for more than 20 years.
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Old 23rd September 2002, 21:42   #6
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Quote:
Originally posted by dylman
My cat is 21 years old and shits behind the computer.
"Dude, are you frying plastic?"..."What the **** ?!"..."God damned cat! Wait till I get my hands on it!"

That has really gotta suck.

jon --> Oh well, your cat will get used to just firing blanks.

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See what I'm listening too.
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Old 23rd September 2002, 23:13   #7
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I've caught him sitting on the power supply for the printer (it's nice and warm). At least he doesn't chew any cables...

There's no need to tell me when I'm right;
I operate on that principle exclusively and with absolute certainty
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Old 23rd September 2002, 23:43   #8
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My Damn Cat

Jon-Joy, we never ever read Garfield, are you stupid? We Read"Mutts"
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Old 24th September 2002, 00:18   #9
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That's for wingin" me after you neutered me

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Old 24th September 2002, 00:25   #10
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cats rule, they know the craic.

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Old 24th September 2002, 01:03   #11
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Darn Cat

Here's the picture, at last I think, I so suck at this
http://www.xmission.com/~emailbox/funnyphotos.htm The Finger

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Old 24th September 2002, 08:34   #12
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Re: My damn cat

Quote:
Originally posted by jon_joy_1999
I don't care how hard you sling that cat against that wall, it never stuns 'em, does it. they just bounce off with that attitude, "Oh is that the way we're gonna play, all right. Check your boots buddy-boy".

you throw your cat against the wall?? is this a regular occurrence?
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Old 24th September 2002, 08:43   #13
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what does a cat when your not home


sitting on the coutch with a beer and the remote. Watching pr0n while masterbating.

ROFLMAO

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Old 24th September 2002, 08:49   #14
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thats like my twin feline brother. damn

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Old 24th September 2002, 09:02   #15
simon snowflake
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ROFLMAO even more

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Old 24th September 2002, 12:11   #16
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my cat was neutered...hes just fine...

oh, he does like to sit on the scanner, its warm....
and he likes to play with my dog too

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Old 24th September 2002, 21:27   #17
jon_joy_1999
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Re: Re: My damn cat

Quote:
Originally posted by binary hero



you throw your cat against the wall?? is this a regular occurrence?
ya. sad isn't it.

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Old 24th September 2002, 21:44   #18
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My dam Cat

After reading that I,I, well ,went out!!

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Old 25th September 2002, 01:34   #19
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Re: My damn cat

Quote:
Originally posted by jon_joy_1999
he's draggin' his butt on the carpet. It's like "Look at mee, What's Missing From This Picture!?, What am I gonna Tell my friends?
Glad to know my cat is not the only one that does that.... but its a she... and i think she is trying to get poo off her ass hair.... not sure, never looked.
its sick and disturbing, expecialy at night after long sessions of net surfing, faintly seeing your cat going along on on its ass draging on the carpet. I was like "OH shit, am I seeing things... or worse.
then it happend 2 more times.

ya, cats dont like getting "broken" much, my cat hated it... but i didnt know better b/ i was like 5.
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Old 25th September 2002, 01:43   #20
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My dam cat

No joking at all. Please take your cat to a vet. If you are somewhat low on funds, as we all have been, there are very good clinics. The original post was done by a person whose cat had had surgery. Cats can get worms, parasite disorders or lower bowel problems. Sometimes it is just diet ;even allergy. But if she is scooting and that's the term, she needs a vet Good luck and here's a cute picture, ok?

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Old 25th September 2002, 02:05   #21
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LMAO @ that finger one. I use it as my desktop pic.
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Old 25th September 2002, 02:50   #22
jon_joy_1999
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My son got a bucket full of GI Joes. But he can't say GI Joe, so he calls them IG Joes. And this cat is so bizzare, he'll go into my son's room and take one of his IG joes and bring it into the kitchen and start fighting with it. Well my son doesn't like it, he gets mad. He comes up to me and goes "Dad, Kitty gots my IG Joe again."
"Well get it from the cat."
And I hear this "REEEAAARR!!!!" and I'm like "Get it, don't kick it from the cat."
"It was a assident"

these IG Joes came in a bucket and my wife and I were cleaning them up and we noticed that the bucket wasn't filled back up, but we couldn't find them anywhere. About a month ago we were stripping the kitchen floor and we pulled the stove back and there was 50 of them underneath the stove. It was an IG Joe Prisoner Camp. Apparently this cat would beat 'em up and go "Get-in-there! Get-in-there! Get-in-there! SHHH! no-talk-king no-talk-king."

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Old 25th September 2002, 04:36   #23
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My cat is sooo boring.... all she does is sleep all day...
She likes to sleep on my back... but if I dare to move, my feet will regret it.
Attached Images
File Type: jpg susi.jpg (49.5 KB, 177 views)

Salaam
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Old 25th September 2002, 06:33   #24
simon snowflake
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ROFLMAO cos of IG Joes

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Old 25th September 2002, 07:08   #25
jon_joy_1999
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Quote:
Originally posted by Rocky Raccoon
My cat is sooo boring.... all she does is sleep all day...
She likes to sleep on my back... but if I dare to move, my feet will regret it.
looks like she keeled over and died

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Old 25th September 2002, 09:09   #26
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Quote:
Originally posted by simon snowflake

what does a cat when your not home


sitting on the coutch with a beer and the remote. Watching pr0n while masterbating.

ROFLMAO
Kitty Porn.

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Old 25th September 2002, 09:15   #27
jon_joy_1999
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Quote:
Originally posted by SSJ4_Gogitta
Kitty Porn.
LMAO. thats sick.

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Old 25th September 2002, 09:47   #28
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my cat died about two months ago...

He uses statistics like a drunk uses lamp-posts: for support, not illumination.
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Old 25th September 2002, 11:19   #29
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My dam cat

Even though they are a pain in the ass ,sometimes, we sure miss them when they are gone. And as for Rocky R. Oh sure an adorable puppy And a beautiful cat...uh we hate, yep ,hehehhhheehehehhe

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Old 25th September 2002, 11:50   #30
jon_joy_1999
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Quote:
Originally posted by Herbster
my cat died about two months ago...
my condolences for the lost family member (hey thats what mine are. they got places at the dinner table [wifes idea, not mine])

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Old 25th September 2002, 12:28   #31
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how do you teach a cat to use the toilet...i wish i could teach mine...he has his face in it almost as much as the dog.

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Old 25th September 2002, 12:56   #32
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Quote:
Originally posted by Herbster
my cat died about two months ago...
Sorry to hear, I've always lived with cats and dogs... they are like my kids to me. About 3 months ago my dog (see attach) was killed by a car (that's when I got the husky) I hate it when something like that happens

Quote:
Originally posted by SSJ4_Gogitta
Kitty Porn.
Oh yes baby... let me touch your wet pussy...




your cat I mean
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Salaam
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Old 25th September 2002, 13:00   #33
simon snowflake
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the dog "Perla" looks cute, what brand is it (I know its not brand, but I always call it the brand of a dog)

"Perla" is a brand of coffee here

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Old 25th September 2002, 13:05   #34
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a mutt
Her mother was a poodle though.

Salaam
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Old 25th September 2002, 13:09   #35
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Quote:
Originally posted by s1138
how do you teach a cat to use the toilet...i wish i could teach mine...he has his face in it almost as much as the dog.


yes s1, we all know your cat is clinically insane, and i'm told they get it from the owner...... suprise suprise.




btw... perla looks like a stuffed puppy, seriously... that shit's freaky. but extremely cute though.
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Old 25th September 2002, 15:49   #36
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my pets are strange...my cat acts like a dog and my dog acts like a cat....

its strange.

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Old 25th September 2002, 16:00   #37
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ROFL
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Old 25th September 2002, 16:05   #38
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Quote:
Originally posted by jon_joy_1999
My son got a bucket full of GI Joes. But he can't say GI Joe, so he calls them IG Joes.


Ohhhhhhh, it's Bill Engvall! Hehe, I love him.

If any of you get a chance, listen to "Here's Your Sign" gigs by him. Classic stuff
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Old 25th September 2002, 16:25   #39
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Quote:
Originally posted by MetallichicA




Ohhhhhhh, it's Bill Engvall! Hehe, I love him.

If any of you get a chance, listen to "Here's Your Sign" gigs by him. Classic stuff
I got a whole cd of his. i'm planning to post the whole CD throughout the GD. I already have the Golf part down
now i need the state fairs, having sex and it's relation to the movies. thats about it. (I think)

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Old 25th September 2002, 20:57   #40
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Rofl at that get fuzzy comic...

These are too funny. I would post a picture of my cat that LAYS ON MAGAZINES but I don't have a picture of that.
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